Wednesday, October 26, 2011

nothing in particular

{My pickle (on the right) copying her mother's every dance move.}

I was just pondering how two years can change so much.  One day you get an idea, you see something someone has done and you think, "I could do something like that, but in my own way".  Like being an actress, or an artist, or a dancer.  We see something so many people have done before and we have an urge to be part of it, but something new, because inside all of us is harboring a magnificent chest of amazingness that is unlike anyone else's amazingness.  I guess to put it simply it is like having a dream.  A 'What do you want to be when you grow up?' type of dream.
I've always had dreams, I guess everyone always is constantly having dreams.  But two years ago I had a dream, and I began down the road to fulfilling it and then there were these road blocks that appeared and it was almost like I was told that I couldn't go down this road, figure something else out.
Find a detour.
So I picked up my (imaginary) bags and went back to that fork in the road I found a while back and decided to try that one.  No, road blocks again.
So I turned around again and tried a new road.
And you know, while I've never quite found the end of that road (I'm not sure I ever will), I've learned so much.  So much from just trying.  So much that I never would have learned if I had just sat there at the beginning of the road and looked and wished and looked.
So maybe the whole goal isn't actually the dream I made up in first place.  Maybe that's just an idea, a great idea.
Maybe the real goal is what I get to experience as I try.  To the new opportunities I see unfolded in front of me because I was placing foot after foot forward instead of sitting down and waiting.  And who I am now and who I will be later when I just keep picking up and trying and trying and trying.

I'm not alone right?

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